


Kuru Versus Guro

by TheseusInTheMaze



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Anal Sex, Blindfolds, Blow Job, Bondage, Fear Play, Finger Sucking, Knifeplay, Low Self Esteem, M/M, Rimming, blowjob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-04-17 01:41:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14177811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheseusInTheMaze/pseuds/TheseusInTheMaze
Summary: Dan gets some words mixed up. Some other stuff happens, too.





	Kuru Versus Guro

**Author's Note:**

  * For [whatwiththeegobangandsuch](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatwiththeegobangandsuch/gifts).



> Edited by Angel! Thanks, darling! 
> 
> I loves you, Jordyn. You're the best! <3

Dan was balls deep inside of Arin, his hips twitching, when Arin moaned out "fucking rip my throat out."

Dan paused. 

Full on paused, and Arin's heart was beating very hard in his ears, as his chest rose and fell.

Fuck.

"What?"

"Sorry," said Arin, and he looked to the side, squirming on Dan's cock. "You can keep fucking me, just forget I said anything."

"No man, it's totally fine," said Dan. 

His cock was still hard, at least.

"So why aren't you moving?"

"Are you into, like... what is it, kuru?" 

Dan looked confused, and his face was right over Arin's, which made it even more confusing. 

"What are you talking about?"

"You know, kuru. Where you get off on, like, gore and shit."

Awareness dawned like a new day.

"Do you mean _guro_?"

"Yeah, that," said Dan. "What do I know the word "kuru" from?"

"That's the disease you get from fuckin'... eating human brains," Arin said, and now he was starting to laugh.

Dan made a surprised noise, and rolled his hips forward as his cock twitched.

"Dude," said Dan, "I can feel it when you laugh. You get tighter."

"You should get me to laugh more often, when you're fucking me," Arin countered, rolling his own hips, trying to push against Dan's cock.

God, but it was nice inside of him.

"I'm afraid I'll make you laugh too hard, and you'll laugh my dick out."

"Your dick ain't comin' out, buddy," said Arin, "unless, you know, you're gonna come out. More than you already have."

"Oh my _god_ , Arin," Dan groaned, and now he was laughing as he held Arin's thighs open, his fingers digging into the softness.

The pain of it was enough to make Arin's cock twitch, to make the pleasure that much sweeter.

Arin was going to cum pretty quickly, at this rate.

It was just so... it was almost perfect.

And then Dan was kissing Arin, and Arin was clutching at Dan's shoulders, humping into the each thrust, his knees digging into Dan's sides, and then it was all a mess of kissing and fucking, until Dan was cumming, Arin was cumming, and they were in a gross, sticky pile.

Dan was lying on top of Arin, his face in Arin's shoulder, and he was kissing along Arin's neck, his stubble ticklish.

"Why'd you tell me to rip your throat out?" 

Dan's voice was gentle, and it rumbled through Arin's own chest.

"It's nothing," Arin said, trying to sound casual.

Dan could totally feel Arin's heart beating faster.

Oh god.

"You sure?"

"It's certainly not kuru," said Arin, and then he was laughing again.

Dan made an amused noise, and he rolled off of Arin.

Arin immediately missed the warmth of Dan's body, although he didn't say anything - sometimes, Dan needed to breathe, and to not touch anyone else with the rest of his body.

Although his hand was already pressed against Arin's, squeezing Arin's fingers. 

"I think I saw a documentary about kuru," said Dan, his tone thoughtful. "I don't remember what else it was."

"Were you watching Hannibal or something?"

"Nah," said Dan. "That show freaks the fuck outta me."

"What, really? Suzy liked it - the aesthetic is so _her_ I sometimes think it was made in a lab for her."

Dan snickered.

"My problem is that all the food on Hannibal looks so... you know, tasty. And then I have to think about the fact that it's people, and then I feel gross and I worry about getting kuru."

"Aren't you pretty much a vegetarian?"

"I eat fish and chicken and turkey," Dan pointed out. 

"That's practically vegetarian."

"Holly would disagree with you."

"Fair enough," said Arin. "But yeah. Kuru. Not the same thing as guro."

"Could you get kuru from guro?"

"I don't think so," said Arin. "Maybe with vore?"

"What's vore?"

"Eating someone alive," said Arin. "Like, sexually."

"... huh," said Dan. "Do they have to be alive when you do it?"

"I think so. That'd be what separated it from cannibalism." 

"Are you, like, into cannibalism?"

"No," Arin said quickly, because he wasn't.

Exactly.

He wasn't entirely sure what he was interested in, when it came to this kind of thing.

Except that it was weird.

He'd never mentioned it to Suzy, because he was always worried about her judging him for it.

... although come to think of it, she probably wouldn't. 

But still.

"If you were, I'm sure we could find a way to do it. Not, like, for real cannibalism, obviously. But if we tried role play."

"Role playing vore," Arin said, his tone flat.

"Well, you said you're not into vore, so it wouldn't be vore," said Dan, his tone surprisingly chill.

"Since when did you get so calm about this kind of thing? What happened to the dude that was weirded out by animal tail butt plugs?"

"I started dating you and Suzy," Dan said, and then he was pressing closer, his legs wrapped around Arin's.

"We're not that kinky," Arin said, the defensiveness almost automatic.

Dan got up on one elbow, looking down at Arin, one eyebrow up.

"Really?"

"Really!"

"So the time you guys put me in a cock cage for a month?"

"You asked for that!"

"Or the time with the leather?"

"Who doesn't like leather?"

"The rope?"

"They put that shit in music videos these days!"

"Oh my _god_ , dude, you're the most in denial person I've ever seen," said Dan, and he sounded amused.

"I'm not in denial," Arin said. "I just... know people who are a lot more kinky than I am. I don't think of myself as that kinky, because there are people who are a lot more kinky than me. I don't think there's anything wrong with being kinky or anything, it's just... not exactly a label that fits me."

"There's always gonna be someone who's more kinky than you are," said Dan. "It's like being tall."

"Mmm?"

"Like, okay, in our social circle, we're the tall dudes, yeah?"

"More or less, yeah."

"Except when we go on Good Mythical Morning with Rhett and Link, and then we're like, the short people, because Rhett is so damn tall. So that doesn't make us short, it just makes Rhett more tall."

"That's surprisingly insightful," Arin said, his expression thoughtful. 

"You don't need to sound so shocked," Dan said, his tone somewhere between amused and offended.

"A thousand pardons," Arin said, and he leaned up, kissing Dan on the mouth, a long, sweet, deep kiss.

Some time later, when they'd both finished kissing, finished the kind of ridiculous post coital talk that is only really interesting to those participating in it, they showered.

Dan washed Arin's hair, and Arin washed Dan's chest.

"What kind of stuff would you be against," Arin said, carefully, slowly.

"Hm?"

"Like, you said you'd be okay with role playing vore stuff. Which is cool. But what... wouldn't you be okay with?"

"I don't want to drink pee," Dan said. "I don't want anything to do with shit. I'd be okay with, like... I think I'd be okay with most role playing stuff, as long as it's not with Nazis or the KKK or whatever."

Arin nodded.

"... I don't like spitting," Dan added. 

"Fair enough," said Arin. 

"Is there anything _you_ don't like?"

"I can't do, like, serious gags, because I'm not really able to open my mouth that wide, you know?"

"Right."

"And I don't like sounding."

Dan gave a little shiver.

"Fair enough," he said thickly. "I don't think I’m into that either."

"Gotcha," said Arin.

"But... if you wanted to do some weird role play stuff, I'd be totally up for that," said Dan. "I like weird shit."

Arin snorted.

"What kind of weird shit?"

"Just about any kind, if it looks like fun," said Dan. "Like, did you know that some people have a thing for just dumping things on top of each other's heads? Like pie fights!"

"You'd wanna do that?"

"I wouldn't be against doing that," Dan said, in that specific tone of voice that Arin recognized as Dan trying not to implicate himself.

The guy was as subtle as a neon sign.

"But we're talking about what you'd like," said Dan, and he took Arin's face in his big hands, his palms pressed against Arin's cheeks, the tips of his long fingers resting on Arin's temples. "Okay?"

"Okay," said Arin. "I just need to... you know, figure out what it is that I want first."

"Right," said Dan. 

And then Arin was kissing Dan again, their chests pressed together, his chest rising and falling with each breath, the water pounding down on his head. 

There were certainly worse places to be, all things considered.

* * * 

“I don’t, like, get it up to violence or whatever,” Arin said, some time later, when they were both in that quiet place before sleep.

Dan was lying curled on his side, his back to Arin. 

Arin was on his back, one hand on Dan’s hip.

“Hm?”

“I don’t get turned on by violence,” Arin said. “Like, violence in and of itself. But I like the idea of… like, you know, of you using me however you want to. If you wanted to slit my throat or cut me open or whatever. If it made you happy.”

“So you want me to kill you?”

At least Dan didn’t sound freaked out, which was something, right?

“Nah,” said Arin . “I mean… unless you wanted to really do it. Like, if you really wanted to role play it with me I’d be okay with it.”

“Right,” said Dan. 

“But… I also like… knives and shit. The danger of it. Because I know you’d never put me in danger, you’re… you, but at the same time, it’s… you know, a knife or a claw or whatever. I think I like the idea of being afraid, but not really… like, not really afraid-afraid.”

“Would you wanna do something with a knife?”

“... yeah,” Arin said into the quiet room. 

“Cool,” Dan said, his tone drowsy. “Lemme think on it.”

“Deep thoughts?”

“The deepest.”

Arin made an affectionate noise, and he patted Dan on the hip.

“Of course,” said Arin. 

“And you know it,” said Dan into his pillow. 

Arin snorted, and let his eyes drift shut.

* * *

Two weeks later, Dan looked shifty eyed, when Arin arrived at Dan’s house for their date.

“You okay, dude?”

“I’ve… how would you feel if I told you that I thought up a thing. For your kink thing.”

“My kink thing?”

Arin kicked his sandals off, stretching, his hands over his head, his back arching. 

It had been a long day.

It was good to be here - to be with Dan, after a long week.

His back was aching, and he was more jittery than usual. 

“You… you wanna be afraid, right?”

“RIght?”

Where was this going?

“What if I told you I wanna scare you. Not, like… seriously scare you. But scare you enough that you get something out of it.”

“I’d be up for it,” Arin allowed.

“... next question,” said Dan, and he looked nervous, but intrigued. “How clean is your butt?”

“I washed it before I came over,” Arin said. “I always shower before I come see you.”

“Well, yeah, okay,” said Dan. “I just wanna be careful, ya know?”

“I guess I do?”

“Exactly,” Dan said, and he was grinning. “I just don’t wanna get kuru or anything.”

“... Dan, you’re not gonna get kuru,” Arin said, and he was fighting back laughter.

“I mean, yeah, but it’s a good… catch all for other shit.”

“It’s a fucking prion disease,” Arin said, and now he was starting to laugh.

He couldn’t help it!

“Well, yeah, okay, sure, but still.”

“Are you gonna eat my brain?”

“I’m not gonna eat your brain,” Dan said. “I might try to suck it out of your dick, though.”

Arin’s cock, which had been at a reasonable half chub, seemed to get rock hard, almost instantly. 

“Um,” said Arin. “It’d have to have quite the journey.”

“Oh my god, Arin, I’m trying to dirty talk you,” said Dan, and then he was kissing Arin, because apparently his words weren’t entirely working, and you couldn’t really go wrong with a make out, right?

Right.

* * * 

Arin ended up flat on his back on the bed, and Dan was on top of him.

Dan’s bony chest was pressed against his own chest, and his hands were in Dan’s hair, twisting them around and around his fingers, tugging on it, and Dan was moaning against him. 

“Right,” Dan said, “as nice as this is, I’ve got an idea.”

“An idea?”

“Oh yeah,” said Dan, and he was grinning.

He looked like some wild creature, his eyes dark, his hair a halo around his head. 

“What kind of idea?”

“The kind of idea where you wear a blindfold and I do what I want to you,” Dan said, and his face was doing… something.

Arin couldn’t entirely read it.

Did he even want to?

His heart was beating very fast, his hands were sweating… holy fuck.

“Okay,” Arin said. “And if I want it to stop?”

“You tell me to stop,” Dan said. “And I like to think I can read you, y’know?”

“Yeah,” Arin said. “Okay. I… I trust you.”

“Okay,” said Dan, and then he was leaning back, getting off of Arin, so that he was standing at the food of the bed. “I’m gonna find my blindfold. I want you to get naked.”

“Naked-naked?”

“All the clothes off.”

“Okay,” said Arin, although his stomach was tight with nerves.

“Are you okay with me tying your wrists up?”

“Yeah,” said Arin, his voice thick. “Yeah, um. I’m okay. I can do it.”

“You sure?” 

Dan was shooting Arin a concerned look.

“Yeah,” said Arin, and he grinned, self conscious. “I’m… I’m really into this idea. But it’s… intense, you know? Especially since I’m not sure what you’re planning.”

“Do you want me to tell you?”

“No,” Arin said quickly. “God no. I like… you know, the whole not knowing. But it’s kinda nerve wracking.”

“Right,’ said Dan. 

“Are _you_ okay with this?”

Arin was fiddling with the buttons of his shirt, slowly unbuttoning it, then shrugging out of it.  
He caught Dan’s eyes on him, and he flushed. 

“You’re really fuckin’ hot, you know that?”

Dan’s tone was casual, but his gaze was heated.

Arin flushed, staring at his lap.

He was still wearing his jeans. 

“Thanks,” said Arin. 

“I mean it,” said Dan. “You’re fuckin’ hot.”

“I believe you,” Arin said, and he was standing up, unbuttoning his pants, unzipping them, then kicking them off. 

He was standing there, in pink Hello Kitty boxers, obviously erect.

He wasn’t sure what he was feeling.

He wasn’t sure he wanted to know.

“You’re afraid of that, aren’t you?”

Dan’s voice was quiet.

“Hm?”

“I think you’re afraid of thinking of yourself as, like, hot,” said Dan, as Arin carefully pushed his boxers down.

“Dunno what you’re talking about,” Arin said.

“I mean it,” Dan said. “That’s totally a thing.”

Arin rolled his eyes. 

“I think you’re reading too much into things,” he told Dan. 

“You know I’m right,” Dan said, and then he was handing Arin the blindfold.

Arin put the blindfold on, closing his eyes as well. He flopped onto the bed, flat on his back, and he stretched his arms up over his head. 

“How you gonna do this?”

“I’ve actually got under the bed restraints,” Dan said, as if that was just… a thing that people said. 

Holy _shit_. 

“When did you get those?”

“A while ago,” said Dan, and he sounded nearby.

Then there was neoprene on Arin’s wrists, and the sound of velcro. 

Arin’s arms were on the bed, and Arin curled his fingers into the sheets.

His other wrist was attached as well - Arin tugged experimentally, and found himself bound pretty well.

“And if I wanna get out?”

“Just say the word,” said Dan. “Now… I’ll be right back.”

“Wait - you’re going somewhere?”

“I’ll be right back,” Dan said, and then there was the weight of Dan sitting on his hips, Dan leaning forward and kissing him. 

Dan’s thick hair against his cheeks, Dan’s hot lips against his own.

“Right back,” Dan said again, and he patted Arin on the chest.

“Right,” Arin said, his voice thick.

* * * 

Arin lay on Dan’s bed in the darkness of the blindfold and the inside of his own eyelids, trying to quiet the fear that was growing in his own stomach.

You weren’t supposed to leave someone alone if they were tied up.

But he wanted to be afraid.

… and, realistically, it wasn’t like Dan had a big house.

The guy had long legs - he could make it into the room before Arin even finished yelling.

Okay.

It was okay.

It was all going to be okay.

The sweat on Arin’s chest was cooling - so was the sweat at his armpits, on the backs of his knees.

His legs were free, and he moved them, almost absently, planting his feet on the bed.

His cock was dripping pre, right down his shaft, to puddle in his groin. 

And then there was clattering, and Dan was back.

“Sorry about that,” Dan said, and his tone was bright. “Okay. I’m back.”

“Hi, back,” said Arin. “I’m Arin.”

“Oh my god,” Dan said, and he sounded like he was laughing.

The bed dipped down next to Arin. 

Arin’s eyes were still shut, and he licked his lips - his nerves were enough to make him squirm.

Why was he even so anxious?

It was Dan.

“You look so fucking hot right now,” said Dan. “All laid out like that for me. I want to eat you alive, fuck.”

“I thought you were worried about kuru,” said Arin, his tone teasing.

“Oh my god,” said Dan, and then there was something sharp and cold against Arin’s throat.

It was a knife.

It had to be a knife - nothing else was that cold and that sharp.

_Fuck_. 

Arin froze. 

His cock twitched, his heart hammered in his ear, and the knife just sat there, the sharp edge of it just… there, against his throat. 

If he moved the wrong way his throat would be slit, and he’d die there, right then and here on the bed.

Oh god.

“You’re a lot less sassy like this,” Dan said casually, and he was drawing the knife down Arin’s belly circling each nipple. “I dunno if I like it, though. One of the fun things about you is your mouth.”

And then two fingers were shoved into Arin’s mouth, and Arin sucked on them eagerly, every nerve acutely aware of the coldness that was traveling down his belly.

“I like your mouth this way, though,” said Dan. “Wrapped around some part of me. Would you like that, Ar? Sucking my cock while I’ve got a knife to your throat?” 

Arin nodded, partially because the knife was against his belly, partially because… holy fuck, the idea of it was enough to make his eyes roll back in his head.

And then Dan was sitting on him again, and there was a knife against Arin’s throat again, as he sucked Dan’s fingers like he was in a porno, sliding his tongue between them, then tracing along the tips of Dan’s fingers.

… Dan needed to cut his nails better. 

There was a jagged edge.

He’d bug Dan about it later.

Dan pulled his fingers out of Arin’s mouth, tracing the outline of Arin’s lips with those same damp fingertips. 

“It’s a pity I can’t see your eyes,” Dan said, his tone still casual.

His bony ass was digging into Arin’s lower belly - the head of Arin’s cock was just barely touching the crack of Dan’s ass, as far as Arin could tell.

“Mmm?”

“You’ve got the most gorgeous eyes,” said Dan, and then the knife was… was moving lower, along Arin’s ribs. “I know you don’t think you’re that attractive, but… dude. You’re hella sexy.”

“You did _not_ just say “hella” while we’re fucking around,” Arin said, and he would have shoved the blindfold off of his face to give Dan a Look, if he was able to use his hands.

Not really an option at that point, but still.

He managed to convey “are you fucking kidding me?” without the use of his eyes.

Hopefully. 

“God,” said Dan, “you never stop, do you?”

And then something sharp and cold was pressed against the base of Arin’s cock. 

Oh.

Oh fuck.

“D’you like that?”

Dan pressed down, gently - if he pressed down too hard, Arin would have lost his cock. It would be full on cut off.

Arin would be, quite literally, unmanned.

Emasculated?

… and inexplicably, Arin was grinning.

“What’s so funny?”

Dan pressed the sharpness against Arin’s cock, harder.

Arin shuddered.

“I know you know I’d never cut your cock off,” said Dan. “Because… you know, I like you with your dick still attached. I don’t even know what I’d do if I cut your dick off. Suzy would kill me.”

Arin cackled.

How could he not?

It was just… Dan being Dan, only Dan was holding a knife to his dick, and that should have been scary, and it was, a little bit, but it was a lot of other stuff too.

Arin was going to cum like a fucking geyser.

“I don’t even know what I’d _do_ with a detached dick. Do you, like, put it in a jar of formaldehyde? Which, admittedly, you’ve probably got a lot of lying around.”

Arin was laughing so hard that he couldn’t breathe - if he hadn’t had an erection, he might have been worried about pissing himself.

But holy fuck, he was scared, and he was _laughing_ , and he couldn’t breathe, this was all just so… weird.

“So yeah,” said Dan, and then Dan was getting off of Arin’s belly, and that was a shame, although it did make it easier to breathe. 

And then… then Dan was settling between Arin’s legs.

Dan wasn’t wearing a shirt, and his bare shoulders rubbed against Arin’s thighs as he shoved Arin’s thighs open further.

There was another knife against Arin’s dick - he could tell it was a different knife, although he didn’t know how he knew.

But the knife was at the base of his dick, and then Dan’s mouth was on his asshole.

Fuck.

Arin made a desperate noise, and the knife at his dick dug in a little - just enough for Arin to freeze, and then tilt his hips up, as Dan pushed on them.

“Much better,” Dan said, and his breath was ticklish against Airn’s hole.

Arin shuddered, spreading his legs wider, and then Dan’s tongue was inside of him, and Dan was using one hand to hold his ass open.

And Dan was… going to town, even as he adjusted the knife, to press down on the top of Arin’s cock, right where it was connected to Arin’s body, and Arin’s toes were curling, he was struggling to stay still. 

“Fuck, Ar, Dan said, and his breath was thick. “You’re _gagging_ for it, aren’t you?”

“I’m… I want it,” Arin said. 

“What if I wanted to fuck you with this knife?”

The knife traced along Arin’s belly, then went under Arin’s balls, and Arin shuddered.

“... okay, I don’t want that,” Arin said, after a few seconds of thought. “I don’t think I can do that.”

“Fair enough,” Dan said, his tone agreeable, and he gave Arin’s inner thigh a kiss. “See, this is why didn’t gag you. So we could communicate.”

“I could totally communicate with you if I was gagged,” Arin said, just to be contrary.

He made an undignified noise, when Dan pinched his inner thigh. 

“Stop being a brat,” said Dan, and then Dan was… getting up.

Wait, what?

Arin squinted, although he couldn’t see anything.

“Just because you’re being a brat, I’m gonna let you stew while I do something else,” said Dan, and then there was the sound of him leaving. 

* * *

Arin didn’t know how long Dan was gone, but the panic and fear that was crawling up his throat wouldn’t abate.

Fuck.

Okay.

This was part of the scene.

This was totally a part of the scene.

And it was Dan.

He was safe.

He was going to be okay.

He was going to be okay.

He just had to breathe.

Okay.

Breathe.

In and out, in and out.

* * *

And then… miracle of miracles, Dan was back.

“You okay, big cat?”

Dan sounded… genuinely worried.

“I’m okay,” said Arin, and he licked his lips. “Are you okay?”

“I’m about to be a lot better,” said Dan, and then he was… climbing back onto the bed, straddling Arin.

And this time he wasn’t wearing any pants.

Not only was he not wearing any pants, he was using one hand to guide Arin’s cock into his hole.

… or, theoretically, Dan could have been using a fleshlight or something like that, but then… no, those were Dan’s flat butt cheeks, pressing against Arin’s groin, and it was too warm, too familiar not to be anything but Dan’s ass.

Dan must have been prepping himself in the other room. 

“Fuck, Arin, you’re really desperate, aren’t you?”

‘Yeah, fuck, yes, please!”

Arin wanted to hold on to Dan’s hips, wanted to thrust up into him.

But he couldn’t.

There was a knife pressed against Arin’s chest, and Dan was digging his knees into Arin’s sides, and it was… it was a lot.

The knife was cool.

Dan’s ass was hot.

Dan’s other hand seemed to be jerking himself off - Arin could hear the familiar slapping, flesh on flesh sound.

And Dan’s ass was flexing around Arin’s cock, as Arin rolled his hips up, sweating, panting.

God, he was so overheated, he was so… everything, and Dan was beginning to bounce. 

“Fuck,” Arin breathed, and then Dan was leaning forward, forward enough that Arin’s dick almost slipped out, and then there was a knife against Arin’s throat, and Dan’s wet cock against Arin’s belly.

“You fucking like that, don’t you? I can feel you twitching. You want me to cut you open. You want me to slit your throat, fuck, you don’t care what I do to you, do you?”

“No,” Arin said, his voice hoarse, and the tension in his belly was building and building.

He was gonna cum like this, with a knife to his throat, his cock in Dan’s ass, and even as he was thinking that, he was cumming, cumming hard enough that he saw white on the edges of his vision.

“Fuck,” Dan said thickly, and he was… he was coming off of Arin’s cock, he was scooting closer, and the head of Dan’s cock was against Arin’s lips. “Suck it. Do it.”

Arin opened his mouth - carefully, the knife was still there - and then he was… it was less that he was sucking dick, more like he was having his face fucked.

He took it down, gladly, and there was dampness on his chest - that must have been his own cum, dripping out of Dan’s ass, and okay, that was… that was kind of gross, but it was also kind of hot, and then the knife was dropped, so that Dan could tangle his fingers in Arin’s hair, and Arin did his best, relaxing his throat, trying to do things with his tongue.

Dan came down his throat, and okay, that was… kind of gross, and the sensation was… less than pleasant, but holy fuck, the _noises_ Dan was making… so fucking worth it. 

And then Dan was withdrawing, was pulling the blindfold off, and Arin was blinking up at Dan, his eyes adjusting.

“How you doin’, big cat?”

Dan looked worried. 

“... why’d you have two knives?”

Why was that the first thing that Arin cared about?

“Two knives?” Dan frowned. Then comprehension dawned, and he grinned. “Oh. Uh, about that.”

“Hm?”

Arin blinked at him again. 

Dan leaned over, and then he was holding up… a butter knife and what looked like a credit card.

Arin raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

“I put the credit card in the freezer,” Dan said, “and used the butter knife. Since, you know, I wouldn’t wanna use a real dangerous knife on you.”

“What, really?”

It had been a cold credit card?

That… wasn’t expected.

Huh. 

Then Dan was undoing the restraints, and Arin was sitting up, stretching, rubbing his eyes.

“So,” said Arin, “still worried about kuru?”

Dan rolled his eyes. 

“You’re never gonna let that go, are you?”

“Never,” said Arin. “We’re gonna be on the Game Grumps couch, and I’m just gonna say, all casual and shit, “this one time, when Dan was fucking me” -” 

“Of course, you have to add the “when Dan was fucking me,”” Dan said, his voice deadpan, as he groped around, presumably for a wipe. 

“Oh, of course, that’s vital,” sid Arin, gesturing for a wipe for himself. 

“So you’re gonna both tell the Lovelies that we’re fucking, _and_ let them know that I didn’t know what fuckin’ kuru was?”

“In fairness,” said Arin, “I dunno if everyone out there knows what kuru is.” 

“So what, you’re just gonna prove you know more than everyone else? That’s kinda douchey.”

Dan made a face. 

“... yeah,” said Arin. “when ya put it like that, it kinda is.”

“I knew there was a reason you kept me around,” Dan said, his tone affectionate, and he leaned in to kiss Arin.

Arin backed up. 

“I’ll wait ‘til after you’ve brushed your teeth,” Arin said, and he wrinkled his nose a bit.

“It was your asshole, you know,” said Dan. 

“It’s not like i lick it in the regular,” said Arin. “I know you call me big cat, but… I’m not an actual cat.”

This struck Dan as the funniest thing, possibly _ever_ \- they were both loopy with orgasm, and they were both a bit of a mess, but then Arin was laughing as well, they were both laughing, there on the bed.

“I love you,” Arin said, out of the blue, and he was staring straight into Dan’s eyes, his own eyes wide, flushing. 

That was… that was a big sentiment. 

Complicated sentiment. 

“I mean, obviously,” said Dan. “You said you’d do anything for me. I figured that’s implied.”

Arin flushed, avoiding eye contact, and then Dan was cupping his cheek, thumbing his cheekbone.

“I love you too,” he said, and he clearly meant it. 

“I’m still not kissing you until you brush your teeth.” 

“Afraid I’ll give you kuru or something?” 

“... I take back every nice thing I said,” Arin grumbled. 

“No takebacks.”

“Says who?!”

“Says me!”

**Author's Note:**

> Like this fic?
> 
> Want me to write you something like it, or something completely different? 
> 
> Come talk to me on my tumblr, theseusinthemaze.tumblr.com!


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